Quick as a Wink, Quicker than you think...

(the title is from a Radio Jingle for Minute Stop in hawaii from when I was a little girl, but it fits perfectly)
Tonight, on the eve before my Daughters 1st birthday, I reflect on the last year. I remember where I was this time last year. I was laying in bed, 200+lbs. Feeling pretty hopeless. Despite being 2 weeks from my due date, I had decided that I was bound to be pregnant for.ev.er. I was planning on googling the number to Guiness Book of world records so I could call them and let them know I was going to be entering my submission for the first women who was pregnant for.ev.er.

ok, now that I look back on my mind frame, I relize how insane that was. But I was SO big and SO uncomfortable, and SO SO SO SO SO over being pregnant and swollen, plus, I had convinced myself that 10-23 would be the day for me, so I was a little disappointed to find myself laying in bed watching TV instead of huffing and puffing and pushing......that is......until 11pm hit.

I will spare you the long details, so I will just summarize:
- I was approx 2 weeks early.
- 4 hours from "I think I just had a contraction" to "look out bellow!"
- I have my babies Au Naturale
- When Audrey was crowning the nurse said "wow this is going to be a big baby" (hey, thanks lady!)
- When Audreys head was out the nurse said "This is a big baby! How early are you?"
- When Audrey was out and placed in my arms immediatly following birth the first words out of her mouth her "That IS a big baby" (alright lady, we got it!)
- You betcha I screamed...oh boy did I scream.
- She was 9lbs 10oz, 21inches.
- She was purple and covered in a ton vernix (that white sticky stuff, common in babies born before their due date)

but she was perfect.

I love this picture. I think it perfectly captures the love I feel for my little girl immediately. I will never forget hearing that first cry, feeling that tiny (ok, big for a 38 weeker) wriggling wet body in my arms for the first time, hearing her first tiny breaths as she nuzzled up to me looking for The Boob, and smelling that sweet baby smell of milk and heaven on her soft downy head.

The adjustment from 1 kid to 2 was HARD...damn hard. Harder than you can ever possibly imagine or prepare for. You can't even put it into words. Its just.hard. And every friend I have had since then that has made that transition has had the same findings...its just.damn.hard...so I know I am not crazy...

But I got through it.

Over the last year, I have watched Audrey grow and blossom into a beautiful lityle girl. She is so sweet. She is a firecracker...I think I am going to have my hands full when this little one gets older. She defitnatly likes to have a good time.  I just can't beleive how quickly this last year has flown by. Yesterday she was holding her head up and learning to roll, tomorrow we blow out her first of many many many many many candles to come in long span of her life.

My Nana believes that our spirits up in heaven pick out their lives. Like the little spirit Audrey said "you know what God, I think I am going to go for Chad and Kristin, that Brynn looks like fun, and she needs a little sister. And that Kristin, well, she takes way too many pictures, but I hear she is a fun mommy, and that Chad looks like a great dad."

Well, I don't know if my Nana is right, but if she is, I sure am glad that Chad and I have been blessed with this bright ray of sunshine that is our little Audrey.

I cannot, not even for one second, imagine a world with out Audrey. It simply couldn't be.

Last night I lay with Audrey in our bed nuzzled in my arms and next to her was Brynn, and Chad...well, Chad decided that it was too cramped of quarters, so he slept in Brynns bed (yeah, we have been having Brynn issues lately) and Brynn was patting my head like I was a dog and singing "the ants go marching" very quietly, and Audrey had her little arm wrapped around my arm with her soft, sweet breaths in my chest and I thought to my self "man, it doesn't get better than this" and I meant it.

So, Happy Birthday Sweet little Audrey. We love you.